Another week has gone by... Edward's eye is finally better, although only started looking normal again yesterday. He had a longer sleep last night, after cluster feeding all evening, and waking up for a last feed at about 10.30pm, he then slept until about 4.30am. He seems bigger every day (which he obviously is!) and doesn't feel like a newborn at all any more. The birth seems very much a distant memory now - four weeks doesn't sound very long, but it seems like an age!
Elizabeth's behaviour is still very challenging. I had a horrible day yesterday, where her behaviour was just awful - really purposefully difficult and hard to 'like' her when she's behaving like that. We're persisting with the sticker charts for good behaviour, but the stickers are few and far between at the moment! I'm not happy with who I'm becoming though - forever having to tell her 'No' and stopping her from doing things. I feel sorry for Edward too, as he'll hear a lot more negativity around him than she ever did at his age.
I opened a savings account for him two days ago, exactly the same as we did for Elizabeth but slightly more organised. Halifax Save4It - opened it over the phone, then took his birth certificate into the branch to confirm details and pay in his first savings yesterday. That trip to the shops marked something of a landmark as I took him in the Hug-a-bub and pushed her in the buggy which was infinitely less stressful than having her exhibiting her 'naughty behaviour' when I can't catch her!
We've been to the library today, went to group on Tuesday, but other than that its been a quiet week. Dad has been having major work done in the garden - to put up decking - so I haven't seen or heard from him all week. Haven't heard from my sister either - all quiet! Our thoughts have turned to holidays, and at the moment we're trying to decide whether to go to the cottage we went to last year for two weeks, or whether to try somewhere new. The fact that we're already going to Devon for a week with my family in July is putting me off going there for another two weeks, particularly as we've been to the same place for the last three years... but then again going somewhere new carries risks! I've identified a website (Babyfriendlyboltholes) which specialises in, strangely enough, baby friendly properties, and have identified one near Woodbridge in Suffolk, so still near to beaches, not tacky, and with the added bonus of having hens to feed/collect eggs from for Elizabeth, and a lake etc in the grounds, although the cottage is smaller. Not sure what we'll end up doing, but we'll have to act fast!
They are both asleep at the moment, so I'm looking forward to the weekend. Ready meal tonight when husband gets in, then an evening of tv and feeding, then hopefully a better day tomorrow with him to help out.
Friday, 27 March 2009
Friday, 20 March 2009
Three weeks old today!
He was weighed on Monday by the Health Visitor and was 11lb 6oz so the mastitis had not affected him one bit. He doesn't really seem to have been bothered by my antibiotics either; The mastitis, thankfully, has fully cleared up. I stopped taking the antibiotics on Tuesday. Unfortunately his sticky eye hasn't, which prompted a mad dash yesterday afternoon to the doctors. Dad came and sat with Elizabeth (asleep thankfully) and I dashed out at 2pm, saw the nurse practitioner, was prescribed new eye drops which have to be administered every four hours, then dashed to Boots to collect the prescription, then dashed home again.
Dashing seems to be the order of the day. Husband went back to work on Monday and I was absolutely dreading it. It is a kind of panicky terror that sees me through the day. Typically feed Edward, get Elizabeth up at about 6.30am, get her washed and dressed, then either feed him, or start with our breakfast, then either feed him or have a shower, not forgetting hands/teeth, and sorting out the washing. I feel like a sort of full-time laundry manager actually. Every day there is a nappy wash to do, and usually one light wash and one dark. Monday is her bed change day, Friday is ours, somewhere like Wednesday is towels day... Yesterday and today I've had washing out on the line for the first time, so feel I'm using less electricity!!
Edward seems to feed constantly all afternoon and evening until finally giving up at around 8.30/9pm, then he sleeps until around 12.30, feeds, sleeps again until around 6ish, although sometimes there is a 3am and a 7am - just depends. He seems to have quite a long sleep in the morning, although if I didn't put him to bed he wouldn't. He is quite fretful, but when he's had a nappy change and a feed he will generally settle after crying a little bit. I can tell by the cry if he's got wind, and if he has he won't settle at all until that is resolved. Last night he was really sick - lost a whole feed, and I had to change his sleepsuits twice, so that was quite dramatic. In the early days he was getting through sheets/blankets like nobodys business but he's a bit better now!
We went to group on Tuesday (he slept all morning) and to Sainsburys on Wednesday, but other than that just surviving the day has been all we've managed. Elizabeth got out in the garden with her Grandad yesterday, and earlier in the week I think she went out with her Dad, but it has been fairly boring for her.
This weekend we've got to visit Great Gran and the in-laws (Mother's Day/Birthday) on Saturday, then Sunday has been scheduled as a rest day. Not quite sure how that will pan out. Looking forward to watching Moving Wallpaper tonight, and having a bit of help for a couple of days... Take-away and Casualty tomorrow! Woo hoo!
Dashing seems to be the order of the day. Husband went back to work on Monday and I was absolutely dreading it. It is a kind of panicky terror that sees me through the day. Typically feed Edward, get Elizabeth up at about 6.30am, get her washed and dressed, then either feed him, or start with our breakfast, then either feed him or have a shower, not forgetting hands/teeth, and sorting out the washing. I feel like a sort of full-time laundry manager actually. Every day there is a nappy wash to do, and usually one light wash and one dark. Monday is her bed change day, Friday is ours, somewhere like Wednesday is towels day... Yesterday and today I've had washing out on the line for the first time, so feel I'm using less electricity!!
Edward seems to feed constantly all afternoon and evening until finally giving up at around 8.30/9pm, then he sleeps until around 12.30, feeds, sleeps again until around 6ish, although sometimes there is a 3am and a 7am - just depends. He seems to have quite a long sleep in the morning, although if I didn't put him to bed he wouldn't. He is quite fretful, but when he's had a nappy change and a feed he will generally settle after crying a little bit. I can tell by the cry if he's got wind, and if he has he won't settle at all until that is resolved. Last night he was really sick - lost a whole feed, and I had to change his sleepsuits twice, so that was quite dramatic. In the early days he was getting through sheets/blankets like nobodys business but he's a bit better now!
We went to group on Tuesday (he slept all morning) and to Sainsburys on Wednesday, but other than that just surviving the day has been all we've managed. Elizabeth got out in the garden with her Grandad yesterday, and earlier in the week I think she went out with her Dad, but it has been fairly boring for her.
This weekend we've got to visit Great Gran and the in-laws (Mother's Day/Birthday) on Saturday, then Sunday has been scheduled as a rest day. Not quite sure how that will pan out. Looking forward to watching Moving Wallpaper tonight, and having a bit of help for a couple of days... Take-away and Casualty tomorrow! Woo hoo!
Saturday, 14 March 2009
The first two weeks...
I can't believe two weeks have gone by!
I stayed in hospital on the Friday he was born, and that night was horrible. He was literally feeding constantly - I would put him down on the bed, feed him, pick him up, put him in his cot, then put him down to feed him again... I got about two hours' sleep, and felt wretched...
The next morning was quite stressful because I didn't know whether or not I'd be going home. There was a staff shortage and husband had driven in for visiting at 10am. They said it wouldn't be until the afternoon, then they said maybe around 12... so husband had to wait in the waiting area, and I had to hang around stressed out that Elizabeth would need picking up etc.
Eventually we managed to get out of the doors, and set off for home, via my parents to pick Elizabeth up. It felt very strange - sort of calm but anxious about what lay ahead!
Saw my sister and parents briefly as we loaded Elizabeth in, then came home and I was so grateful to see my own home again! We had something to eat, and the rest of the day(s) are a blur of feeding and trying to survive!
On the Sunday the midwife came and weighed him, and said he was doing really well. Another midwife came on Monday and did the heel prick test. The week ticked along. He had a monster feeding night that nearly wiped me out, then we had our first 'trip' out on the Wednesday. We went to the Town Centre, and picked up a few bits and pieces like some blue sleepsuits and a present for the children's cousin (still can't get used to the fact that I have children!!). It was exhausting just dealing with Elizabeth really. I was pushing the pram, and when husband was paying for things she was free to play up, and it was quite frightening not knowing what way to turn!
On Thursday the midwife came and took a swab from his sticky eye. He had put on loads of weight and was past his birth-weight, so that was positive. I had my stitches looked at as they had been quite painful, but all was well. Sister-in-law came in the afternoon and brought her son.
On the Friday Hannah brought baby William and we had a nice day. I don't remember too much about the weekend, I think my Mum and Dad came on the Saturday and husband's parents came on the Sunday having recovered from their colds.
On Monday the midwife came again and weighed him - 10lb 7oz, so he'd put on quite a lot of weight. He was no longer looking jaundiced as he had been a bit yellowish earlier in the week. She did say the results of the swab were back and he had Group B Strep, which he'd caught from me during the delivery. I would never had known I was a carrier, and it should be fairly harmless but he'd need antibiotics to treat it. She then said she could cut my stitches, so I had to assume the position once again and she cut out two stitches. I had an hour or so where I felt relatively comfortable, then I started to shiver. I felt ill - like I had 'flu. Before the symptoms took hold we did decide on his name:
EDWARD JAMES ROY
and rang our respective parents to make the announcement. Most people seemed to have expected us to call him James, and there was a deafening silence when we said Edward. The texts we sent out to friends produced a somewhat warmer response with some people even saying they loved his name!
By Tuesday morning husband was on the NHS Direct website looking up mastitis, and I was in tears again knowing that was what I had. My left boob was red and hard and painful, and I felt as though I had no energy whatsoever. I got on the phone and spoke to the GP who confirmed my diagnosis, then sorted out prescriptions for my antibiotics, his eye drops and my Anusol for the revolting and very painful piles that I seem to have developed.
That Tuesday passed in a blur with me mostly confined to bed. The Health Visitor came and did the hearing screen (all ok) and agreed to come back the followin Monday to weigh Edward. I returned to bed, and managed a tiny amount of lunch, then tea...
I felt moderately better on Wednesday, but still weak. I had to hotfoot it to the town centre when Edward was asleep to be re-fitted for nursing bras. Marks and Spencers had nothing, so I had to go to Debenhams and spend a sizeable amount on two 36E's.
Thursday was my birthday! I did feel better but the redness/hardness remained. My Dad came over in the Morning, and Elizabeth played outside in the garden on a bright and sunny day. Claire and Rebecca came over after lunch, then husband's parents and sister and nephew. Exhuasting! We had a takeaway curry, then went to bed.
On the Friday we were in Shrewsbury for 10am to register Edward's birth, then went to Sainsbury's with the two of them and had a lovely trip to Starbucks! She had fruit toast and water, I had a smoothie and husband had a cup of tea. Later that day I made a flying visit to the library to stock up on chick lit. and to get new books for Elizabeth, and also stopped by at the GP's to register Edward as a patient. I posted the Child Benefit Claim too. It was Comic Relief, so while Edward had a feeding frenzy in the evening I watched some of that.
Saturday - today - marked a landmark nightmare day in terms of Elizabeth's behaviour. She's started spitting and keeps hitting husband in the face, and says "No!" every time you ask her to do something. We set off to the Wyevale garden centre to get plants as Mother's Day presents, and I bought her some stickers to use on a positive reinforcement chart. As yet no success though. Edward wore his first outfit today - blue cords and a stripey top. He has thus far been defined by his sleepsuits alone! He's just had a bath, I've just watched Casualty and posted a question on Mumsnet about Elizabeth's behaviour. It's 9.45pm and I think I'm headed for bed.
I stayed in hospital on the Friday he was born, and that night was horrible. He was literally feeding constantly - I would put him down on the bed, feed him, pick him up, put him in his cot, then put him down to feed him again... I got about two hours' sleep, and felt wretched...
The next morning was quite stressful because I didn't know whether or not I'd be going home. There was a staff shortage and husband had driven in for visiting at 10am. They said it wouldn't be until the afternoon, then they said maybe around 12... so husband had to wait in the waiting area, and I had to hang around stressed out that Elizabeth would need picking up etc.
Eventually we managed to get out of the doors, and set off for home, via my parents to pick Elizabeth up. It felt very strange - sort of calm but anxious about what lay ahead!
Saw my sister and parents briefly as we loaded Elizabeth in, then came home and I was so grateful to see my own home again! We had something to eat, and the rest of the day(s) are a blur of feeding and trying to survive!
On the Sunday the midwife came and weighed him, and said he was doing really well. Another midwife came on Monday and did the heel prick test. The week ticked along. He had a monster feeding night that nearly wiped me out, then we had our first 'trip' out on the Wednesday. We went to the Town Centre, and picked up a few bits and pieces like some blue sleepsuits and a present for the children's cousin (still can't get used to the fact that I have children!!). It was exhausting just dealing with Elizabeth really. I was pushing the pram, and when husband was paying for things she was free to play up, and it was quite frightening not knowing what way to turn!
On Thursday the midwife came and took a swab from his sticky eye. He had put on loads of weight and was past his birth-weight, so that was positive. I had my stitches looked at as they had been quite painful, but all was well. Sister-in-law came in the afternoon and brought her son.
On the Friday Hannah brought baby William and we had a nice day. I don't remember too much about the weekend, I think my Mum and Dad came on the Saturday and husband's parents came on the Sunday having recovered from their colds.
On Monday the midwife came again and weighed him - 10lb 7oz, so he'd put on quite a lot of weight. He was no longer looking jaundiced as he had been a bit yellowish earlier in the week. She did say the results of the swab were back and he had Group B Strep, which he'd caught from me during the delivery. I would never had known I was a carrier, and it should be fairly harmless but he'd need antibiotics to treat it. She then said she could cut my stitches, so I had to assume the position once again and she cut out two stitches. I had an hour or so where I felt relatively comfortable, then I started to shiver. I felt ill - like I had 'flu. Before the symptoms took hold we did decide on his name:
EDWARD JAMES ROY
and rang our respective parents to make the announcement. Most people seemed to have expected us to call him James, and there was a deafening silence when we said Edward. The texts we sent out to friends produced a somewhat warmer response with some people even saying they loved his name!
By Tuesday morning husband was on the NHS Direct website looking up mastitis, and I was in tears again knowing that was what I had. My left boob was red and hard and painful, and I felt as though I had no energy whatsoever. I got on the phone and spoke to the GP who confirmed my diagnosis, then sorted out prescriptions for my antibiotics, his eye drops and my Anusol for the revolting and very painful piles that I seem to have developed.
That Tuesday passed in a blur with me mostly confined to bed. The Health Visitor came and did the hearing screen (all ok) and agreed to come back the followin Monday to weigh Edward. I returned to bed, and managed a tiny amount of lunch, then tea...
I felt moderately better on Wednesday, but still weak. I had to hotfoot it to the town centre when Edward was asleep to be re-fitted for nursing bras. Marks and Spencers had nothing, so I had to go to Debenhams and spend a sizeable amount on two 36E's.
Thursday was my birthday! I did feel better but the redness/hardness remained. My Dad came over in the Morning, and Elizabeth played outside in the garden on a bright and sunny day. Claire and Rebecca came over after lunch, then husband's parents and sister and nephew. Exhuasting! We had a takeaway curry, then went to bed.
On the Friday we were in Shrewsbury for 10am to register Edward's birth, then went to Sainsbury's with the two of them and had a lovely trip to Starbucks! She had fruit toast and water, I had a smoothie and husband had a cup of tea. Later that day I made a flying visit to the library to stock up on chick lit. and to get new books for Elizabeth, and also stopped by at the GP's to register Edward as a patient. I posted the Child Benefit Claim too. It was Comic Relief, so while Edward had a feeding frenzy in the evening I watched some of that.
Saturday - today - marked a landmark nightmare day in terms of Elizabeth's behaviour. She's started spitting and keeps hitting husband in the face, and says "No!" every time you ask her to do something. We set off to the Wyevale garden centre to get plants as Mother's Day presents, and I bought her some stickers to use on a positive reinforcement chart. As yet no success though. Edward wore his first outfit today - blue cords and a stripey top. He has thus far been defined by his sleepsuits alone! He's just had a bath, I've just watched Casualty and posted a question on Mumsnet about Elizabeth's behaviour. It's 9.45pm and I think I'm headed for bed.
Tuesday, 3 March 2009
The birth story...
If I can remember rightly - here goes:
On Wednesday 25th February in the evening I was getting more regular contractions (some every five minutes, most every ten) and rang the consultant ward at Shrewsbury. They said I could come in and be checked (had already had a bath and paracetamol then put the TENS machine on) so I rang my parents, and they came over while I was moving the duvet and pillows from our room into the spare room and getting the bags ready. Husband was busy eating flapjack and necking Nurofen as he was full of cold and half asleep.
We arrived and went to be assessed in a small room on the labour ward - I had the monitor strapped to me, and we were left alone for a while. The midwife who looked after us said that she'd rushed Elizabeth onto the rescusitair when she was born (having read our notes) - husband said she looked familiar. It turned out that the contractions weren't strong enough to call it established labour, and I had a choice to either go back home or go up to the antenatal ward. I decided I'd be no better going home - wouldn't sleep and would still be panicking about when exactly to return to hospital, so opted for the ward.
They took me into a curtained bay, and left me there. By this time it was about 4am? All around me there were women moaning and sighing and snoring - some being carted off to the labour ward... I just perched on the bed crying, still with my contact lenses in and TENS machine buzzing away. I kept having to go to the bathroom to re-apply the TENS machine pads because they kept peeling off, so the machine would work fine then all of a sudden I'd be aware that it was doing nothing! At 5am I walked to the nurses station crying, saying could I go home? They examined me at 5.30am and said I was about 3cm and shouldn't go home. Husband came in at 10am, and stayed with me until 12. I was distraught about missing Elizabeth - felt really sad and worried. He returned at 2pm, and we walked around the corridors (saw Claire's friend Liz visiting presumably for an antenatal appointment). The contractions were really quite painful, and husband kept a note of the times - they were recorded on my tiny notepad as follows:
2.25 (40 seconds)
2.36 (1 minute)
2.46 (55 seconds)
2.55
3.04
3.11
3.16
3.21
3.28
3.55
3.44
3.53
4.04
At this point husband left, and I told him not to come back at tea-time but to concentrate on putting Minky safely to bed and that if anything were going to happen later on he'd be called in (although I was far from believing anything was likely to happen - ever!).
4.10
4.15
4.28
4.35
4.55
5.00
5.08 (at which point I switched the TENS machine off because it was annoying me!)
5.22
5.38
5.45
5.58
6.10
I had tea - chicken and bacon pie, then went back to my cubicle and just cried and cried. A midwife came in and asked what was wrong - I just couldn't understand why I wasn't making any progress and had well and truly had enough. The contractions were bloody painful at this point, and the midwife said how about having some Meptid to relax me. I wasn't initially keen, but felt frankly so dreadful that I thought perhaps it might help. She went and got the injection and administered it into my left thigh, and while she was doing this she felt my stomach while I was having a contraction.
This marked a bit of a turning point. She seemed to think the contractions were really strong, and asked me to shout her (then her colleague as she was going off the ward for a few minutes) if I was having a contraction. I duly did, and they seemed to think this meant something. I felt dreadfully sick and spaced out at this point, and was clutching my sick bowl concentrating like hell on not throwing up. All around me was visiting time, and the lady in the bed next to me had her children visiting and they were talking across to the woman opposite, all really loud and confusing to me...
Before I knew it the midwife said she'd examine me, she did, and said I was 5cm. She was going to ring husband, and they'd get a wheelchair ready to take me through to the labour ward. Someone came with a luggage trolley, and the wheelchair duly arrived for me. I was taken through, still clutching sick bowl.
As I arrived in the little room which was very similar to the one Elizabeth was born in I was literally retching, but wasn't really sick. I was left on my own for a bit. I think it was at about 8pm. I was given the gas and air thing, and started using it, and they lay me on the bed and attached the monitor. Husband arrived, and I was really, really sick - he had to grab another bowl after I'd filled one!
The midwife kept calling me 'Em' and was trying to be upbeat but basically suggested that nothing much was happening. I was confused about why I'd been brought through and she seemed to suggest that it might be for more pain relief as the contractions were still every 10 minutes, and were slowing. They slowed more as I was half dozing, lying on my back with the monitor on. I stopped feeling quite so sick.
Another woman came in to put the 'Venflon?' into my arm - failed attempt, leading to another (successful attempt) in my right hand. It was a bit awkward as I was having to explain that I couldn't make a fist because I could barely move my middle finger (now that the splint had been off a few days).
The midwife and the student that was with her suggested I lie on my side to try to get things moving again, and the student eventually suggested taking the monitor off and trying to mobilise. This I did - they highered the bed, and I tried to move around as much as I could. At 10 o'clock the midwife and student changed shift, and a new midwife (Jan) arrived. I was getting tearful again, saying it was going to be like before and that the previous midwife had been muttering about the syntocinon drip being needed (although she'd read in my birthplan that I didn't want it). Jan said that the contractions were getting better, and that she thought I should ignore what had been said previously.
I was now on the right hand side of the bed, leaning onto the bed, with husband behind my applying strong pressure down onto my spine with each contraction, and the midwife leaning across the bed and looking at me. I had to breathe really deeply through each contraction, and with each one felt over-whelmed with the pain. I found it particularly hard when they 'wouldn't go' - i.e. the contractions lingered on. After a while Jan suggested the TENS machine so we strapped that back on, and that helped somewhat. My back hurt really badly apparently because the baby was back to back.
We carried on like this, with the midwife saying take each contraction as it comes, don't think ahead or it will be over-whelming. She told me she was working until 8am, and we'd definately have a baby by then! I remember cottoning on to this ressuring thought.
After a while I asked if there was any reason why I couldn't go into a bath, and was told there wasn't, apart from the fact I'd have to take the TENS machine off. Jan went off to run the bath, and we made our way, with me walking along with a sheet tied around me. For some reason I left my knickers and t-shirt in the delivery room, and ended up going into the bath with my bra on. I got in, and instantly my body just sort of seized up (well, I say body - more like my bottom!) It felt like I needed the toilet, and sure enough there was poo and blood and everything all floating in the water. There was a cannister of gas and air and I was sucking away on that like crazy, while the midwife did an internal examination and said there was a last lip of cervix left. I was disheartened, but she said would I like her to get rid of it? So at the next contraction she kept her hand there, and that was that. I had to get out of the bath quickly and get onto a wheelchair where I was hastily pushed back to the delivery room. I had to leave the gas and air and was screeching like a banshee as we made our way back. When I got to the room I was aware that I was literally pooing on the floor and was saying to husband to stand out of the way! I leant over the bed, but the midwife said it would be better if I got onto the bed, on my hands and knees and leant over the back of the bed. I did this, and felt the most incredible urge to push. So much so that I couldn't really take in the gas and air although I was trying! I had several really strong contractions where I was really pushing and felt like something was 'there'. Jan said that if I put my hand down I could feel the baby, and would feel its head turn as it made its way out. I tried to do this, but was beside myself with pain. The midwife and husband both said they could see the head, and I pushed again and the whole baby sort of slithered out and was put down on the bed underneath me. I was absolutely incredulous about the size of HIM - a boy. I had expected given the feel of what I had just delivered that it would be something smaller ironically, but seeing him lying underneath me was just incredible! She asked if husband wanted to cut the cord and he did, then he just lay there under me while she injected me and I delivered the placenta into a sort of silver bowl. Eventually he was wrapped in a towel and given to husband, and I was left lying on the blood-soaked bed, shivering and feeling like I coudn't move. Really weak, and really odd. She brought in a cup of tea for us both, and I breast-fed him - he didn't seem to latch on on one side but was fixed on straight away on the left hand side and had a good feed. I had to be stitched - the episiotomy scar had torn, and the midwife said she was unsure which bit went where so she called a registrar to look at it. There was mention of me having to go to theatre, but this came to nothing. I did have to have gas and air while I was prodded and poked, even having been given the lignocaine to numb the area. I was then stitched up by the midwife, and given a sort of bed bath. I was desperate for the toilet and was wheeled through to the bathroom on the wheelchair, and was somewhat amazed that I could stand up and get onto the toilet myself. We had to wait a while again (during which time I think I phoned Dad and husband's Mum) while the midwife attended to other things. He was born at 1 minute past midnight, it was getting on for 4am by the time we were ready to leave. My bags were loaded onto a trolley, I kissed husband goodbye, and my entourage (me on wheelchair, baby in cot and luggage x 3 bags on trolley) were wheeled out of the corridor. The icing on the cake was when the midwife said "Midwife led unit" I couldn't believe that's where I was being admitted. I was shown to my bay, and lay down in bed. I remember thinking that I didn't recognise my own baby's cry and was a bit worried that I wouldn't hear him, but I did have a couple of hours sleep and fed him again when I woke up in the morning at about 6am.
On Wednesday 25th February in the evening I was getting more regular contractions (some every five minutes, most every ten) and rang the consultant ward at Shrewsbury. They said I could come in and be checked (had already had a bath and paracetamol then put the TENS machine on) so I rang my parents, and they came over while I was moving the duvet and pillows from our room into the spare room and getting the bags ready. Husband was busy eating flapjack and necking Nurofen as he was full of cold and half asleep.
We arrived and went to be assessed in a small room on the labour ward - I had the monitor strapped to me, and we were left alone for a while. The midwife who looked after us said that she'd rushed Elizabeth onto the rescusitair when she was born (having read our notes) - husband said she looked familiar. It turned out that the contractions weren't strong enough to call it established labour, and I had a choice to either go back home or go up to the antenatal ward. I decided I'd be no better going home - wouldn't sleep and would still be panicking about when exactly to return to hospital, so opted for the ward.
They took me into a curtained bay, and left me there. By this time it was about 4am? All around me there were women moaning and sighing and snoring - some being carted off to the labour ward... I just perched on the bed crying, still with my contact lenses in and TENS machine buzzing away. I kept having to go to the bathroom to re-apply the TENS machine pads because they kept peeling off, so the machine would work fine then all of a sudden I'd be aware that it was doing nothing! At 5am I walked to the nurses station crying, saying could I go home? They examined me at 5.30am and said I was about 3cm and shouldn't go home. Husband came in at 10am, and stayed with me until 12. I was distraught about missing Elizabeth - felt really sad and worried. He returned at 2pm, and we walked around the corridors (saw Claire's friend Liz visiting presumably for an antenatal appointment). The contractions were really quite painful, and husband kept a note of the times - they were recorded on my tiny notepad as follows:
2.25 (40 seconds)
2.36 (1 minute)
2.46 (55 seconds)
2.55
3.04
3.11
3.16
3.21
3.28
3.55
3.44
3.53
4.04
At this point husband left, and I told him not to come back at tea-time but to concentrate on putting Minky safely to bed and that if anything were going to happen later on he'd be called in (although I was far from believing anything was likely to happen - ever!).
4.10
4.15
4.28
4.35
4.55
5.00
5.08 (at which point I switched the TENS machine off because it was annoying me!)
5.22
5.38
5.45
5.58
6.10
I had tea - chicken and bacon pie, then went back to my cubicle and just cried and cried. A midwife came in and asked what was wrong - I just couldn't understand why I wasn't making any progress and had well and truly had enough. The contractions were bloody painful at this point, and the midwife said how about having some Meptid to relax me. I wasn't initially keen, but felt frankly so dreadful that I thought perhaps it might help. She went and got the injection and administered it into my left thigh, and while she was doing this she felt my stomach while I was having a contraction.
This marked a bit of a turning point. She seemed to think the contractions were really strong, and asked me to shout her (then her colleague as she was going off the ward for a few minutes) if I was having a contraction. I duly did, and they seemed to think this meant something. I felt dreadfully sick and spaced out at this point, and was clutching my sick bowl concentrating like hell on not throwing up. All around me was visiting time, and the lady in the bed next to me had her children visiting and they were talking across to the woman opposite, all really loud and confusing to me...
Before I knew it the midwife said she'd examine me, she did, and said I was 5cm. She was going to ring husband, and they'd get a wheelchair ready to take me through to the labour ward. Someone came with a luggage trolley, and the wheelchair duly arrived for me. I was taken through, still clutching sick bowl.
As I arrived in the little room which was very similar to the one Elizabeth was born in I was literally retching, but wasn't really sick. I was left on my own for a bit. I think it was at about 8pm. I was given the gas and air thing, and started using it, and they lay me on the bed and attached the monitor. Husband arrived, and I was really, really sick - he had to grab another bowl after I'd filled one!
The midwife kept calling me 'Em' and was trying to be upbeat but basically suggested that nothing much was happening. I was confused about why I'd been brought through and she seemed to suggest that it might be for more pain relief as the contractions were still every 10 minutes, and were slowing. They slowed more as I was half dozing, lying on my back with the monitor on. I stopped feeling quite so sick.
Another woman came in to put the 'Venflon?' into my arm - failed attempt, leading to another (successful attempt) in my right hand. It was a bit awkward as I was having to explain that I couldn't make a fist because I could barely move my middle finger (now that the splint had been off a few days).
The midwife and the student that was with her suggested I lie on my side to try to get things moving again, and the student eventually suggested taking the monitor off and trying to mobilise. This I did - they highered the bed, and I tried to move around as much as I could. At 10 o'clock the midwife and student changed shift, and a new midwife (Jan) arrived. I was getting tearful again, saying it was going to be like before and that the previous midwife had been muttering about the syntocinon drip being needed (although she'd read in my birthplan that I didn't want it). Jan said that the contractions were getting better, and that she thought I should ignore what had been said previously.
I was now on the right hand side of the bed, leaning onto the bed, with husband behind my applying strong pressure down onto my spine with each contraction, and the midwife leaning across the bed and looking at me. I had to breathe really deeply through each contraction, and with each one felt over-whelmed with the pain. I found it particularly hard when they 'wouldn't go' - i.e. the contractions lingered on. After a while Jan suggested the TENS machine so we strapped that back on, and that helped somewhat. My back hurt really badly apparently because the baby was back to back.
We carried on like this, with the midwife saying take each contraction as it comes, don't think ahead or it will be over-whelming. She told me she was working until 8am, and we'd definately have a baby by then! I remember cottoning on to this ressuring thought.
After a while I asked if there was any reason why I couldn't go into a bath, and was told there wasn't, apart from the fact I'd have to take the TENS machine off. Jan went off to run the bath, and we made our way, with me walking along with a sheet tied around me. For some reason I left my knickers and t-shirt in the delivery room, and ended up going into the bath with my bra on. I got in, and instantly my body just sort of seized up (well, I say body - more like my bottom!) It felt like I needed the toilet, and sure enough there was poo and blood and everything all floating in the water. There was a cannister of gas and air and I was sucking away on that like crazy, while the midwife did an internal examination and said there was a last lip of cervix left. I was disheartened, but she said would I like her to get rid of it? So at the next contraction she kept her hand there, and that was that. I had to get out of the bath quickly and get onto a wheelchair where I was hastily pushed back to the delivery room. I had to leave the gas and air and was screeching like a banshee as we made our way back. When I got to the room I was aware that I was literally pooing on the floor and was saying to husband to stand out of the way! I leant over the bed, but the midwife said it would be better if I got onto the bed, on my hands and knees and leant over the back of the bed. I did this, and felt the most incredible urge to push. So much so that I couldn't really take in the gas and air although I was trying! I had several really strong contractions where I was really pushing and felt like something was 'there'. Jan said that if I put my hand down I could feel the baby, and would feel its head turn as it made its way out. I tried to do this, but was beside myself with pain. The midwife and husband both said they could see the head, and I pushed again and the whole baby sort of slithered out and was put down on the bed underneath me. I was absolutely incredulous about the size of HIM - a boy. I had expected given the feel of what I had just delivered that it would be something smaller ironically, but seeing him lying underneath me was just incredible! She asked if husband wanted to cut the cord and he did, then he just lay there under me while she injected me and I delivered the placenta into a sort of silver bowl. Eventually he was wrapped in a towel and given to husband, and I was left lying on the blood-soaked bed, shivering and feeling like I coudn't move. Really weak, and really odd. She brought in a cup of tea for us both, and I breast-fed him - he didn't seem to latch on on one side but was fixed on straight away on the left hand side and had a good feed. I had to be stitched - the episiotomy scar had torn, and the midwife said she was unsure which bit went where so she called a registrar to look at it. There was mention of me having to go to theatre, but this came to nothing. I did have to have gas and air while I was prodded and poked, even having been given the lignocaine to numb the area. I was then stitched up by the midwife, and given a sort of bed bath. I was desperate for the toilet and was wheeled through to the bathroom on the wheelchair, and was somewhat amazed that I could stand up and get onto the toilet myself. We had to wait a while again (during which time I think I phoned Dad and husband's Mum) while the midwife attended to other things. He was born at 1 minute past midnight, it was getting on for 4am by the time we were ready to leave. My bags were loaded onto a trolley, I kissed husband goodbye, and my entourage (me on wheelchair, baby in cot and luggage x 3 bags on trolley) were wheeled out of the corridor. The icing on the cake was when the midwife said "Midwife led unit" I couldn't believe that's where I was being admitted. I was shown to my bay, and lay down in bed. I remember thinking that I didn't recognise my own baby's cry and was a bit worried that I wouldn't hear him, but I did have a couple of hours sleep and fed him again when I woke up in the morning at about 6am.
Monday, 2 March 2009
He's here!
I don't think I'll have time to write the whole birth story, but the good news is he's arrived (finally). He was born at 1 minute past midnight on Friday 27th February 2009, weighing in at 9lb 3oz, 58 cm long, with a 36cm head circumference. I had him in the Consultant Labour Ward of Royal Shrewsbury Hospital, having been transferred there from the antenatal ward at about 8pm that evening. I had gas and air, and used the TENS machine as he was back-to-back. I also attempted to get in the bath, but that prompted a hasty retreat as I was literally about to have him. He was delivered onto the bed in front of me as I was on my hands and knees clinging to the back of the bed. Husband cut the cord. I tore at the site of my episiotomy from last time, and had to be stitched up, and have been walking gingerly ever since. I stayed in hospital on Friday, and came home on Saturday lunch-time. He feeds lots. He's been opening his eyes a lot more today. I haven't been getting much sleep (at all - half an hour last night, 2 hours the night before) but he is great. We haven't settled on a name yet. Elizabeth loves him. First Time Mum no more!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)